Sunday, April 17, 2011

Catholic School Girls Rock, Part III

It has been easily confirmed that this study on Catholic school girls has been the greatest idea I've ever had. The support , compliments and phone numbers I've been getting is simply overwhelming. So many former Catholic school girls have come out of the woodwork and ask me if they can be interviewed next. So what I've decided to do is perhaps do a few more interviews randomly throughout the next month or so, and perhaps do a different region of Catholic school girls, to see if they differ any from the three gorgeous Rhode Island Catholic school girls who participated in this study. Right now I'm thinking of the New York/New Jersey/Long Island region, since PC is oozing with these types of girls. Anyways, it should be interesting nonetheless. Now, part 3 is with the lovely Taylor Cotter. I've known Taylor Cotter since the first grade, and she's easily one of the classiest and intriguing girls I've ever known. A perk to having her fill out this survey is that she's a brunette, so we can mix it up from those blondies in the previous interviews. So without further adieu, break out your white polo, knee highs and plaid skirts and enjoy the final part (for now) of the Catholic School Girl Experience.


Catholic School Girl Experience: We’ll start easy and have some word associations. Tell me the first word that comes to mind when you see the following: Jim - I answered these with more than one word. There are just too many flowing memories to stop.



  • Plaid Skirts - Love love love! Though, ask any Bay View girl and the plaid skirt was a last resort when all your navy blue skirts were dirty. Body temperature went up about 5-10 degrees and rolling wool tight under a polo shirt caused for awkward marks around the waist. However, these are so classic and I just wish they were able to be purchased in stores.

  • Abercrombie - If you wore Abercrombie before age 14 at Bay View, you were awesome. If you wore it after age 14, you might as well not even show your face. However, most girls picked the Hendricken boy who looked most like an Abercrombie model, even if it was just a polo shirt and cargo shorts.

  • Nuns - Katie's answer seems to forget that some of the most amazing moments in high school came from the nuns. One word? Hilarious.

  • James Franco - When we went to Bay View, I'm pretty sure James Franco had only been in Spiderman. However, I think that badass, weird, artsy and incoherent types like Franco are pretty much what all BVA girls dream of.

  • Softball - "Is she a lesbian?" "No, she just plays softball."

  • The Notebook - I am the biggest outlier from all students at Bay View Academy (and all women): I have never seen The Notebook.

  • Is it true that you will automatically start pouring tears whenever Konstantine by Something Corporate starts playing? - Yes, yes it is.

  • What was the strangest name of any Sister that worked at Bay View? - Sister Perpetua - she was our religion teacher in seventh grade. She was the perfect nun - always mad at us for not using proper cursive and teaching us songs about Jesus. She taught us that you can't pray for dogs and that it's quite easy to convince a teacher that you need "time to reflect" instead of taking a test.

  • Are laxbros all they are cracked up to be? - When Jim Kirwan, laxbro #1 re-entered my life, as well as his wonderful bros Andrew Chace, Matt Rizzini and Chris Rizzini, my opinion of the laxbro culture skyrocketed. Katie and I used to sneak over to East Providence High School to watch lacrosse games and oogle. Hanging out with the laxbros, especially because of their high opinion of the Catholic School Girl, was incredibly enjoyable and provided for much lunchroom conversation in our junior and senior years.

  • Do you feel that as a catholic school girl, you are holier than thou? - Always - it's not just anyone who can run off all the books of the New Testament (in song).

  • When dancing with a young man, do you always make sure to ‘leave enough room for the holy spirit’? - Protip: leaving room for the holy spirit is an excuse that Catholic girls use when they don't want to be too close to creepers. As Katie said, the proper Catholic school girl NEVER leaves room for the holy spirit, and incurs all consequences.

  • Tell me about the best cat fight you ever witnessed during school. - I don't remember the fight Katie is talking about (this may be a different version of the same story) but the one I remember was two randos getting into a lunchroom fight our junior year. I don't remember anything about what happened, but I saw the whole thing. Coincidentally, I had a detention (for wearing backless shoes) that same week, and I had to sit with them for an entire hour.

  • On average, how many times did you hear the word bitch on any given school day? - A lot, when you go to school with a lot of bitches.

  • Is it true that girls enrolled at catholic all-girls schools do not care about make-up and appearance during the school day? Do you buy this rumor? Cause I don’t. - I agree with Katie - this is no rumor. I tried to wear makeup a few times a week, but this was often applied in the car at a red light when Camille Zaydon held onto the steering wheel from the passenger seat. Hair piled on top of my head, wrinkled polo (another thing I once got detention for), mismatched kneesocks and half-rolled skirt was my uniform of choice. When you are required to wear the same mediocre outfit every day, sometimes (always) you just can't pull yourself to make it look good day after day. I took a slightly more "alternative" route to the Bay View uniform than Katie did - I opted for a hoodie and Vans over Sperrys and cardigan, but the sentiment was always the same - why can't I just wear my own clothes? Like I said, I was once given detention by the Vice Principal for looking "too sloppy" - so rumors are true, Jim Kirwan, the rumors are true.

  • You’re trapped in an elevator for a month. You can have any five items you wish with you. What are they? - Cell phone, DD iced coffee, sweatshirt (doubles as pillow), 1 of 8 class binders to study, nail polish

  • Is Tina Fey an idol of yours? - Tina Fey has been my number one idol since I was 14, giving hope to awkward girls with brown hair everywhere.

  • If things are getting steamy with a significant other, and the said male wants you to dress up as a catholic school girl, do you oblige him or smack the shit out of him? - Smack the shit out of him and wonder why anyone sees any sex appeal in a messy bun and boxer shorts.

  • Is there truth to the rumor that any male teacher at an all girls school is automatically deemed hot? Even if he isn’t all what he’s cracked up to be? - This is false. One out of ten male teachers is considered hot, the other 9 are often considered predatory, creepy, awkard and intrusive. Any girl who has a conversation that goes further than handing in homework with one of these teachers is normally freaked out and their mom calls our guidance counselor, Miss Poppy.

  • If offered a Bloody Mary for a choice of beverage, do you automatically accept? - Not automatically, but I'm always glad to have the option

  • Please state your favorite Pope. - John Paul the First

  • When you were in middle school, did the store Hot Topic used to frighten you, or did you embrace it as a sense of rebellion?- A little bit of both, so I just ordered from the online store.

  • Have you ever dreamed about being a model for Polo or Hollister? - Every day of my life.

  • Are you any good at Croquet?- I wish!

  • If you could associate any rap song to your life, what would it be? - Nicki Minaj - Moment 4 Life

  • Did you have trouble picking out clothes for the first day of school in your freshman year of college after years of having it already picked out for you? - I have trouble picking out my clothes every single day. Somehow, a pile of white polos was a lot easier to sort through than a pile of business casual.

  • Say I’m on a date with a former catholic school girl. How can I win her heart on the first date? - Take her to an Italian restaurant on Federal Hill, don't comment on her chipped nailpolish, ask her about her AP scores and don't make her say how many dates she went on in high school.

  • Who is your dream husband, (dead or alive)? - Andrew McMahon

  • How many pairs of Uggs, leggings, and northfaces do you own, respectively? Also, do you feel that this is a type of non-spoken dress code that all girl once they hit college adhere to? - I have three pairs of Uggs, four North Faces and probably about 15 pairs of leggings. Unfortunately, this is the uniform of college. On days where I wish I could just pull on a polo and BVA sweater, I often find myself wearing the Ugg/North Face/leggings. I try as often as I can to find cute and creative ways to dress, but as all Bay View girls know, sometimes there's just no one worth impressing.

  • Holy Spirit or Holy Ghost? - Holy Spirit!

  • Paper or plastic? - Always plastic.

  • The Strokes or The White Stripes? - Strokes

  • Should I keep my hair long or short? - Short! You look so handsome and classy. I like it very much.

  • *nsync or backstreet boys? - Oh man...*nsync, but just for JT.

  • Bros or hoes? - Hoes, first and forever

  • Finish the sentence: Jesus is… my bff.

It brings a tear to my eye that this third chapter is complete. I have to commend Taylor on actually answering the Strokes or White Stripes question with an actual choice, it's nice that she can follow instructions. That being said, it is very apparant that when asked to give the first word that comes to mind for a word association, it is impossible for Catholic school girls to give just one word. It's also nice that Pope John Paul I got some love, that Innocent III dude was starting to hog the spotlight. Also, I need to meet this Sister Perpetua if she's still kicking. I might have to ask for "time to reflect" in order to hold off taking a test in my American Religious Experience class in the near future. One final thing, I find it awesome that Taylor hasn't seen the Notebook. I think it's every guys dream to find a girl who is not obsessed with that movie, so Taylor you might be having some suitors coming your way trying to woo you. I'd like to thank Meg, Kaitie and Taylor once again for taking this survey. I was skeptical at first about doing this survey, but it turned out to be awesome. I feel like I have earned a small spot in the hearts of all Catholic school girls, which is fine by me.


Much love people, much love.


Jimothy

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